Friday, April 29, 2005

Friday sitting-on-your-ass-after-a-good-day-at-work music

  1. These Boots Are Made For Walking, Family of God

  2. The Ghost in You, Counting Crows

  3. Sexual Healing, Marvin Gaye

  4. Cowboy, Kid Rock

  5. Take Me Out, Franz Ferdinand

  6. Never Been To Spain, Three Dog Night*

  7. Young Hearts Run Free, Kym Mazelle

  8. If She Knew What She Wants, The Bangles

  9. The Chemicals Between Us, Bush

  10. Rainy Day, Guster

* This song will always make me smile and remember the last scenes of Scotland, PA, one of my favorite obscure movies.

Thursday, April 28, 2005

As if you needed more proof that Lawrence Summers talks out of his ass

SCENE: Living room, before dinner. Angry Boy pulls out a big fire truck and a smaller school bus. He starts pushing them around the floor, smiling at me.

APL: How many trucks do you have?

AB: Waaaahhhn... Toooooooooo!


AB: (points to fire truck) Mama!
(points to school bus) Baby!

Suck on it, Summers.

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

More bad analogies than there are Diet Coke cans in my recycling bin

Milbank, funny as usual. Seriously, I love this guy. And not just because he's the only person to ever call me a "gentleman."

Short story: Once upon a time, I was holding the door open for him and someone else, and he said, "Thank you. You're such a gentleman." hahahaha. Had to be there, I guess.

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

How low can ya go?

From corndog:

The Dante's Inferno Test has sent you to the First Level of Hell - Limbo!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)Moderate
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)High
Level 2 (Lustful)Moderate
Level 3 (Gluttonous)Low
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)Very Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)Low
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)Low
Level 7 (Violent)Moderate
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)Moderate
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)Low

Take the Dante Inferno Hell Test

Moreover, during my stay in luxurious Limbo, I'll be enjoying the company of "the virtuous pagans, the great philosophers and authors, unbaptised children, and others unfit to enter the kingdom of heaven." I'll lunch with Caesar, Homer, Virgil, Socrates, and Aristotle, apparently. Great, I can tell Virgil that I much prefered the Aeneid to Homer's Odyssey. He'll be delighted, I'm sure.

Request for reviews

Any parents out there have an opinion on Thomas Phelan's 1-2-3 Magic? We've started doing brief timeouts with AB, more as a way to get him to calm down than anything else. But I'm not sure how to do the counting thing ("I'll give you till three"?)--besides, whenever I start counting, AB just chimes in and counts past me all the way to ten. So I was thinking about getting the book from the library or store, but after reading the reviews on Amazon, I'm not so sure.

Monday, April 25, 2005

Watching the lights go down, letting the cables sleep

In honor of TV Turnoff Week, I bring you the Document Review iTunes Random 10 (not that I'd have been watching TV anyway--no MNF):
  1. Hold It Now, Hit It, Beastie Boys

  2. Letting the Cables Sleep, Bush

  3. High and Dry, Radiohead

  4. All the Young Dudes, World Party

  5. It's Not, Aimee Mann

  6. What You Need Is a Friend, Suicidal Tendencies

  7. Comfort, Michael Penn

  8. Am I Wrong, Love Spit Love

  9. She's Crafty, Beastie Boys

  10. Car, Catherine Wheel

Edited to add: Also in honor of TV Turnoff Week, I will reference a television show in at least one blog post every day. Here, I'll just mention that Bush's "Letting the Cables Sleep" will always make me think of strung-out Carter on "ER," and will always give me chills.

Sunday, April 24, 2005

My child is a freakazoid

Went to lunch at Fuddruckers (or Ruddfuckers, as a friend so recently called it) today. Ordered off the kids' menu for AB: grilled cheese sandwich, fries, and a cookie for dessert. When I was a kid, that would've been my dream meal. Hell, even now that sounds like a pretty good meal to me. I've always said I could live off of cheese and bread.

Well, he showed no interest at all in the grilled cheese sandwich. (And Fudd's uses really tasty bread, too.) He ate a few of the fries, but didn't want any more. I finally had the idea of getting him some tomatoes from the fixin's bar. While I was there, I also picked up a few pickle slices. AB had never had pickles, and I wanted to see if he liked them. He quickly ate the tomatoes and was intrigued by the green slices. He made a hilarious face when he ate the first pickle: he shivered a bit and his face got all scrunched up. But he apparently liked it, because he ate the rest, and I went back for more pickle slices.

Finally, AH and I were done with our burgers, so I went over the dessert stand and got AB's chocolate chip cookie. When I returned to our table, he pointed and said, "Cookie!" I broke it in half; half for him, and AH and I split the other half. AB put his cookie in his mouth but then accidentally dropped it on the table, pretending to eat like Cookie Monster, all fast-moving hands and grunting. It was hilarious. An older man at a table nearby looked like he was going to crack up.

Once he was done pretending to be Cookie, I picked up his uneaten cookie half and held it for him. He took a bite or two out of it, but then moved his head away and said, "No."

"You don't want anymore cookie?" I asked, stunned.

"No." And then he proceeded to grab and eat the remaining bits of tomato.

AH said he wanted a paternity test, because no child of his could possibly prefer tomatoes to chocolate chip cookies. This is the same child who, a week ago, refused to eat any of AH's birthday cake (Boston Cream--mmmmm). Freak. Lovable and adorable freak, but freak nonetheless.

Saturday, April 23, 2005

Same old Cookie

"Casting Off Cookies?" asks the Post.

No, no, a thousand times no. I know whereof I speak. I record "Sesame Street" every day, and watch it every day. I saw the episode that everyone's talking and writing about, the one where cookies are referred to as a "sometime food," and a wise owl tries to explain to Cookie Monster that fruits and veggies are "anytime foods." At the end of the song, Cookie Monster--equipped with all this new nutritional information--declares that "now is a 'sometime,'" and he scarfs the cookie. Not only that, but in Thursday's Cookie-centric episode, all Cookie eats are cookies. Lots of them. With no remorse.

So lay off "Sesame Street." It may be changing with the times, but it's not disrupting the fabric (pun intended) of the characters we all know and love.

Reeeeeally old entries

I went back to my old blog and read some of the first entries, from October 2002. They make me laugh. Not just because I think they're funny--although some of them are. Mostly, I'm laughing at my past self, and how much energy I had back then. The posts are positively charged (must've been all the coffee I used to drink):

So, on the list of piddly things that are bothering me at this particular juncture in human history:

I listen to the classic rock station all day at work, and they do a good job of playing all the '70s rock I can stand: Bad Company, Stones, CCR, Allman Brothers, etc. But I noticed they never played "Baker Street" by Jerry Rafferty anymore. So I emailed in a request. Got a reply from the uber-nice DJ telling me that the station doesn't play that song anymore. WTF is up with that? It was the only station in my area to ever play it.

And, oh yeah, the GOP totally kicked ass in the elections, and the Northern Virginia transporation tax went down the shitter. *contemplates moving to Ireland*

And I think I have a sinus infection. That, or my brain is continuously seeping out of my right nostril, impairing my ability to work, think, breathe, etc.

Despite all this, not in the worst mood ever: going out to lunch today with some coworkers, and bowling (yes, bowling) tonight with some friends.

We're gonna sco-o-ore tonight.
We're gonna sco-o-ore toni-ight.
We're gonna rock,
We're gonna roll,
We're gonna bop,
We're gonna bowl . . .

Whatever happened to Adrien Zmed? And can I name my firstborn child Zmed?

Must have more coffee.

And some of the old posts are reminding me of things I'd totally forgotten about, like the DC sniper:

DC area parties are so odd these days. Everyone was demonstrating his/her sniper-avoidance walk. It was comical and sad all at the same time. (In case you're wondering, I have no sniper-avoidance walk. If he's aiming for me, I want to give him a good, steady target so he can take me out in one shot--don't want to spend the rest of my life a paraplegic. Hope that doesn't sound too morbid. It's just my view of the crazy situation at hand.)

Nostalgia is fun. For me, anyway.

I am old.

More accurately, I feel old. And no one is to blame for my feeling this way but me. (No, not even Perry Ferrell.)

On the drive home from work yesterday, I had two viable listening options on the radio: the new Nine Inch Nails single, "The Hand That Feeds" ... or Boz Skaggs' "Lowdown."

I chose Boz Skaggs.

Trent Reznor is coming over to my house later tonight and taking back all of his CDs.

Friday, April 22, 2005

Why'd they move Earth Day?

It's April 21st and everybody knows today is Earth Day
Merry Christmas, Happy Birthday to whoever's being born
And now I'm trying hard to think of something
meaningful and worthy, kind of earthy
to make everybody ask themselves just

What are we doing here?
and what are we doing to her?

I don't know
What are we gonna do?
What are we gonna do?
What are we gonna do?

2041, the world is gonna end, I've got the message
from a tiny little man who only said that he'd been sent
I'm not a protest singer, I can't write a song to send a message
but it seems to me that this message needed to be sent

What are we doing here?
and what are we doing to her?

I don't know
What are we gonna do?
What are we gonna do?
What are we gonna do?

It's April 21st and everybody knows today is Earth Day
Merry Christmas, Happy Birthday to whoever's being ....

Thank you, Dramarama.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Family Chick

Decided to take this quiz, since I'm now watching "Family Guy" on Tivo (yes, Grand Canyon is over now).

Which Family Guy character are you?

I love Brian. Especially when he wags his tail. Oh, and when he's drunk.


Watching Grand Canyon, one of my favorite movies (and a sorely underrated one) as I type this post. I was in love with this movie when it came out in 1991, and I listened to the score for years afterward. The music alone is moving and energizing--I used to listen to it as I ran the track at the college I used to live near.

Anyway, on to the actual post:

AB is testing the very fabric of my being. As pretty much everyone I know in real life would tell you, I am an even-keel kind of gal. A friend of mine in high school once told me I was the "most emotionally well-adjusted" person she'd ever met. People's impressions of me haven't changed much since then, either. And, for the most part, they are correct. I'd say 95% of the time, I am completely balanced, well-adjusted, and relatively calm.* Which is why I think it's so hard on me that my son is so mercurial with his moods. When I picked him up today from day care, he was in a good mood. But then he decided he didn't want to leave the toys he was playing with, or he didn't want to leave with me--I'm not sure which. Whatever the reason, he started to bawl. I had to pick him up and carry him out of there, crying and screaming the whole way to the car. I wanted to shout at everyone looking at us, "I'm a good mother!!!"

He fussed more in the car on the way home. I eventually took charge. "Do you want to sing ABCs or E-I-E-I-O?" The answer came back "Oh," so I sang "Old MacDonald" for the remaining drive home, about 5 minutes, which actually winds up being a lot of animals. Helpfully, AB was chipping in animal names from the backseat, so I didn't run out of verses.

At home he was wonderful. While I fixed him dinner (which wound up being a hot dog, grape tomatoes, strawberries, a little pita bread and watermelon--yeah, he can put it away), he looked at his "ammal books" [animal books] by himself, pointing at the pictures and trying to name every animal he saw. Before bed, we watched some "Sesame Street" together, him sitting sweetly in my lap like we do every night. When it was time to go to sleep, he waved "night night" to the dogs, hugged me, and fell into his daddy's arms to be taken to his own room.

How does he do this? How does he go from hysterical crying to happy and serene so quickly? And why do I feel like I'm aging exponentially during all this?

* It's just that when I'm not, I'm reeeeeally not.

Monday, April 18, 2005

Lost in Translation

OK, I've decided on the husband/boy thing. They'll be AH (Angry Husband) and AB (Angry Boy) when I'm feeling lazy and don't want to type. When I'm not lazy, they'll be Silly Guy, Cheeky Monkey, or whatever nicknames I feel like appending. Thanks for voting.

So, I finally saw Lost in Translation tonight. I knew I would love it. I think I've not liked just one Bill Murray movie, ever: Quick Change. Plus, not only have I always had a massive crush on the man, but my grandmother always had a thing for him, too. (Grandma rocked--she also had the hots for Joe Montana, and can ya blame her?) So I doubly love the guy.

There was a particularly excellent line in the movie:
The more you know who you are and what you want, the less you let things upset you.

Despite my moniker, I am not angry very often. Or, rather, I am angry, but only by fits and starts throughout the day, throughout the weeks, throughout my life. So I really liked this line, even though I am skeptical as to whether it's entirely true.

Washington Nationals Announce New Mascot: Screech

In a related story, Mark-Paul Gosselaar and Mario Lopez have fired their agents....

Saturday, April 16, 2005

The master of 75% (or, More mindless drivel)

You Scored 75% Correct

You are an 80s expert

You never confuse New Order with the Pet Shop Boys

You know which classical musician Falco rocked

When it comes to 80s music, you Just Can't Get Enough!

You Are Incredibly Logical

(You got 75% of the questions right)

Move over Spock - you're the new master of logic

You think rationally, clearly, and quickly.

A seasoned problem solver, your mind is like a computer!

Actually, I'm incredibly pissed that I only got 75% right on the logic quiz, especially because it doesn't explain what the right answers were. Grrrr.


I'm tired of writing "my boy" or "my son" or, especially, "my husband." Too many letters. So I'm giving in and going the abbreviation route. My only dilemma: what initials to use?

A play off APL?
Angry Husband --> A.H.
Angry Boy --> A.B.

Or something more descriptive?
For the boy:
Smarty Pants --> S.P.
Cheeky Monkey --> C.M.
Chatty Boy --> C.B.

For the husband:
Tall Guy --> T.G.
Silly Guy--> S.G.

Please vote early and often. That goes for you, too, Husband.

Friday, April 15, 2005

Is it even possible to be more normal than average?

You Are 65% Normal

(Really Normal)

Otherwise known as the normal amount of normal

You're like most people most of the time

But you've got those quirks that make you endearing

You're unique, yes... but not frighteningly so!

Thursday, April 14, 2005

You got me.

I thought I'd snuck under the radar, but SuzanH over at My Sad Little World has tagged me for that book meme that's been going around (thanks for the nod, SuzanH!). Not one to shirk my duty:

You are stuck inside Farenheit 451. Which book would you be?

OK, others have said this means what book would I memorize and share with others when all the other books have been burned. My memory's not that good. Can it be a short story? If so, I'll be Thomas Mann's "Tristan." Can it be a play? I'll be "Hamlet." I've got most of that memorized anyway.

Have You Ever Had a Crush on a Ficitional Character?

Whom haven't I had a crush on?! Let's see... Jem from To Kill a Mockingbird (lay off, I was 13 when I first read it). Nick from The Great Gatsby. Ethan Frome (mostly because I pictured him as Liam Neeson, even though I never saw that movie).

What's the Last Book You Bought?

I buy in clumps: Running With Scissors by Augusten Burroughs, Life of Pi by Yann Martel, Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris, and The Unquiet Mind by Kay Jamison. [I assume this meant books for me--otherwise, the answer is "mountains of kids' books for my boy."]

What are you currently reading?

Just finished Running With Scissors a little while ago, and started to read my husband's The Gospel According to the Simpsons but got bored. Must buy more books... I'm thinking Ehrenreich's Nickel and Dimed will be next. It's already on my Amazon wish list, and I've got a $25 gift certificate burning a hole in my pocket.

Five Books for Your Desert Island Cruise Package.

I'll do it by author, I guess.
Gotta have Styron (huzzah for the Commonwealth), so I'll pick Lie Down in Darkness.
Gotta have Carrie Fisher, so ... Postcards from the Edge barely edges out Surrender the Pink.
Fitzgerald, I'll take This Side of Paradise.
Irving, A Widow For One Year.
Dostoyevsky, Crime and Punishment.

I think everyone else has done this, so rather than passing it along, just for shits and grins I'll list the books I've read in the past few years (an asterisk means that I recommend it):

1. Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver
2. A Civil Action by Jonathan Harr*
3. The Iranians by Sandra Mackey *
4. Misanthrope by Moliere
5. Self-Reliance and Other Essays by Ralph Waldo Emerson *
6. Birds of America by Lorrie Moore *
7. The Birth of Tragedy by Friedrich Nietzsche
8. Looking at Law School edited by Stephen Gillers
9. The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker *
10. Planet Law School by “Atticus Falcon”
11. Galileo’s Revenge: Junk Science in the Courtroom by Peter W. Huber *
12. Hannibal by Thomas Harris *
13. Civil Disobedience and Other Essays by Henry David Thoreau
14. Starting Off Right in Law School by Carolyn J. Nygren

1. The Whole Shebang by Timothy Ferris *
2. Journey Into Darkness by John Douglas
3. Faster by James Gleick
4. Obsession by John Douglas
5. Beside Still Waters by Gregg Easterbrook
6. The Double by Fyodor Dostoyevsky *

1. Prodigal Summer by Barbara Kingsolver *
2. What is Man? by Mark Twain
3. Why Christianity Must Change or Die by Bishop John Spong
4. Rimbaud by Graham Robb
5. The Hotel New Hampshire by John Irving *

1. Galileo’s Daughter by Dava Sobel *
2. A Widow for One Year by John Irving *
3. My Declaration of Independence by Sen. Jim Jeffords
4. Lie Down in Darkness by William Styron *
5. The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon by Steven King *
6. A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawking
7. The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell
8. The Iron Ring by Lloyd Alexander
9. The Gambler (& other short stories) by Fyodor Dostoyevsky *
10. Red Dragon by Thomas Harris *
11. Set This House on Fire by William Styron *

1. Live From New York by Tom Shales and James Andrew Miller *
2. Small Wonder by Barbara Kingsolver
3. What to Expect When You’re Expecting by Heidi Murkoff
4. Personal Velocity by Rebecca Miller *
5. Contempt of Court by Mark Curriden *
6. The Fourth Hand by John Irving
7. I Don’t Know How She Does It by Allison Pearson
8. Cold Mountain by Charles Frazier *
9. Carter Beats the Devil by Glen David Gold *
10. The Pact by Jodi Picoult *

1. Life of Pi by Yann Martel *
2. Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris
3. The Unquiet Mind by Kay Jamison

I know, I know. Three books in an entire year is embarrassing. I've already read two this year, though, so I should break that abysmal record.

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Should I take the lump sum or 20 yearly installments?

Saw this over at Not Guilty's:

I am worth $2,184,248.00 on

I wonder if men are valued higher than women, all other variables being equal. That would be interesting to learn, but I don't have the time or the patience to figure it out using the test questions. Besides, some are tailored to the specific sex of the answerer (e.g., I don't think they ask men what cup size they are).

[Oridnarily, I'd think of a segue, but I'm too tired. After you're done reading this post, feel free to come up with one yourself! Ooo, a contest!]

My husband was telling me that he came across some child-free websites. (No, the websites were not child-free; the people who posted on them were, by choice.) I must state that I am completely OK with and nonplussed by child-free-by-choice folks. Whereas most girls (at least, the ones I knew in elementary school) grow up dreaming of a husband and kids, I grew up dreaming of writing and acting. No husband, no kids, no thank you. (Then I met my husband, who effortlessly threw a wrench into all my plans, and I morphed into the Angry Pregnant Lawyer you know and tolerate.) So even though I love my boy more than anything else in the world, I totally understand that not everyone wants kids. Hey, not 10 years ago, I didn't want kids, either.

But the folks on this particular website my husband was describing to me sound... well, nuts. Apparently, they coldly refer to children as "cunt nuggets." I want to grab these people and shake them and yell, "You are a 'cunt nugget,' you fucking idiot! So am I! Unless you sprung full-grown from Zeus' head, or hatched from an egg, you are a 'cunt nugget.'"

People make me tired. I'm going to bed.

Monday, April 11, 2005

Eat at Jo(e)'s

Before jumping into jo(e)'s food meme (condensed), I just have to say that The Breeders' "Divine Hammer" is playing on the cable "alternative" channel. Hooray for college flashbacks.

Favorite food to crunch: Fresh breadsticks.
Favorite comfort food: Kraft shells 'n' cheese.
Food that makes the best noise: Juicy peaches make that great suctioning sound when you tear a bite away.
Favorite picnic lunch: Cheese sandwiches, on any good bread.
Favorite food scene in movie: The 9 1/2 Weeks parody in Hot Shots, with Charlie Sheen and Valeria Golino.
Favorite food lyrics: I want cold pizza for breakfast/And warm Coke to wash it down (aaahhhh)/Maybe a couple of onion rings/Make this world go round/I want cold pizza for breakfast/And a pinch o' cold spaghetti'll do/But there's nothin' in the world that I like better/Than eatin' cold pizza with you. (Christine Lavin)
Least favorite food lyrics: Left some food wrapped up/in a plastic bag/on the kitchen table/way too long/I sat down to eat/next to the bag/I was too tired/to throw it out/I saw a swarm of fruit flies. (Nada Surf)
Best food smell memory: Does my dad's apple cider on the stovetop at Christmas count as a food?
Food that reminds me of the ocean: Cheesesteaks and boardwalk fries.
Most likely to eat for lunch: the Santa Fe Ranch salad
Least likely to eat for lunch: Everything else.
Makes me gag: Eggplant.
Favorite medicinal food: Since jo(e) mentioned cranberry juice already, I'll take yogurt (and its live cultures).
Food that reflects my heritage: On one side, Guinness and potatoes. On the other, saffron chicken and tadig (the crispy rice from the bottom of the pot).
Food most like me: My husband says pizza, because I'm cheesy. Oh, wait, he tells me now that he was kidding. Too late! I liked that answer!

Saturday, April 09, 2005

Observations from a week away

  1. Got on a plane in the past few days. Both the pilot and co-pilot were women (a fact that was pointed out to me by the octegenarian in the seat next to me, who seemed happily surprised). I was immediately reminded of going on a trip with my father when I must have been around 5 years old. I think we were flying to DisneyWorld. The pilot came on over the speakers, and it was a woman. My dad turned to me and said, "Uh oh, a woman pilot? We're going to crash." And I turned to him, full of 5-year-old outrage, and said, "DAD!" And he just laughed. At the time, I thought he was really denigrating women. Now I realize he was just doing it 'cause he knew he'd get a rise out of me, and it was funny to him to make his liberal little 5-year-old daughter get indignant.

  2. Got on another plane. The men nearest to the front were shamelessly flirting with the supernice flight attendant. It was disgusting. While she was demonstrating the oxygen mask, one of the guys said, "Ooo, you do that so well." She kind of smiled and ignored him, but the jerk didn't get it. He went on, "Is this your first time?" GRRRRR. SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUPYOUFUCKER. She responded tersely but politely, "Oh, I've done this tons of times. Wish I wasn't doing it tonight, though--my mother had a stroke this morning and I'd really rather be with her in the hospital." And I don't know if she was serious or was just trying to make the guy feel like shit, but IT WAS AWESOME. He turned white and looked like he was going to vomit right there. I'll bet it will be a while before he flirts obnoxiously with a flight attendant again.

  3. Pinkeye is very contagious.

  4. The worst state in the union is ___________. I will never understand people who choose to live there. Scrivener, you will know what I'm talking about (no, not your current home state).

  5. Met a very nice professor who teaches at Samford. Professors rule.

  6. Cockroaches are disgusting, even when they are small.

  7. There's no place like home.

Monday, April 04, 2005

Leave of absence

Won't have the computer access needed to post for a few days. Wish I could leave you all with something witty and important.

But that wouldn't be me, would it?

So instead of a video of Vern Troyer peeing on the carpet, I leave you with this:

Avast, and have a good week.

Sunday, April 03, 2005

On a lighter note...

Is one of you trying to make me feel better (laughter being the best medicine and all)? Someone found my website by searching "video of vern troyer peeing on carpet."


Saturday, April 02, 2005


Much calmer now. Still pissed, and saddened, really. But I've told the story to a few others, and the telling helps.

Onto better, trivial stuff:

My mother, god knows why, keeps buying sticker books for my son. He loves them, sure. Me? Not so much. Because I have to remove the stickers since he doesn't have the dexterity or fingernails to do it himself. And he gets grumpy if I'm too slow. Moreover, it's not like he knows what to do with the stickers once he's (well, once I've) freed them from their pages. So we have lots of stickers, some whole, some torn, stuck in various places around the house. The floors, our laptops, my legs....

Friday, April 01, 2005


I am This. Fucking. Close. to blowing my anonymity. I want to tell everyone who reads this blog, all 6 of you, what happened at work today. It's unfuckingbelievable. I am so angry and exasperated, I'm barely coherent.

But I can't spill. That is, I won't. 'Cause I'm a fucking coward and I can't afford to get dooced.

So I'll just have some beer and hope this stress headache goes away.