Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Wasted away again in Mamacita-ville

Saw this query from a reader in Tom Sietsema's chat today on the

"Hi Tom,

I'd love your opinion on something that happened to my husband and I while having dinner last Saturday night. I am 8 months pregnant and it's quite obvious. My husband ordered a beer and I ordered a non-alcoholic beer with our dinner, which the waiter brought in the bottles and poured into beer glasses. The waiter took the bottles away. A couple was then seated next to us (the tables were close as they are in what seems to be all restaurants these days). The woman noticed my "beer" and began staring at me pointedly and making rude noises. I finally looked over at her and she mouthed "I can't believe you are drinking that. Shame on you". I was flabbergasted. Her husband started shaking his head at me. I tried to ignore this ignorant couple, but they literally stared and commented at me for a good 5 minutes. My husband turned to them and stated that it wasn't any of their business what I was drinking and to please mind their own business. This just increased the level of the comments/stares. I asked our waiter if he could reseat either us or them - he said that was not an option, as the restaurant was full. I asked to speak to the manager and he said he "could not control guest behavior" and would not ask them to refrain, nor would he move us."

The poster goes on to ask Tom whether the restaurant was guilty of bad customer service for not trying to smooth things out. But I wish I could've replied to that woman to tell her what to do if a situation like that arises again in her remaining weeks of pregnancy:

Call the waiter back, and whisper in his ear--so Mr. and Mrs. Nosy McAsshat don't hear you--to bring out the biggest, most fanciful frozen drink (virgin, of course), something that they couldn't HELP but notice. And tell him to keep 'em coming! Then just sip 'n' grin the night away.


Blogger liz said...

Oooh....I like it, I like it!

8:11 PM, May 18, 2005  
Anonymous Andrea said...

This is why people should not judge other people.

Yes, I know I'm judging people for judging other people. But I can definitely say that I wouldn't stare and make comments at someone in public for being judgemental. Some people are unbelievable.

I think I'd have put on my Outdoor Voice and said "It's non-alcoholic. Is there something you'd like to say to me audibly?"

8:14 PM, May 18, 2005  
Blogger Phantom Scribbler said...

I had someone do that to me when I was drinking a cup of COFFEE while 8 months pregnant with LG. #1, I've never seen any studies that show that a single cup of coffee has any negative effect at any point in pregnancy. #2, it was DECAF.

People, I don't much like them....

10:33 PM, May 18, 2005  
Anonymous Lisa V said...

I too would have shared that it was non-alcoholic and then told them to mind their own damn business.

11:10 PM, May 18, 2005  
Blogger kenju said...

I also would have told them it was non-alcoholic, and I would have tried to do it in a way that degraded them for not knowing it might be non-alcoholic beer. Then I would have told them it was none of their $@#&)^% business!

7:52 AM, May 19, 2005  
Blogger Yankee T said...

Yeah, IS none of their business. Offering them an explanation only validates their self-conferred right to be a BUTTINSKY. I definitely would NOT have excused myself to these azzholes.

9:39 AM, May 19, 2005  
Blogger liz said...

I agree with Yankee Transplant, you shouldn't justify yourself.

I'd rather say, slightly slurring my words, "Gotta get this baby shtarted drinking the good shtuff early!"

4:32 PM, May 19, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Getting the wait staff involved is a terrible idea.

The civil way to end it quickly: "Yeah, I can't believe how bad this non-alcoholic stuff tastes, either."

The less-civil way, more amusing and probably just a quick a conversation-stopper: "What? You think I'm pregnant??!!! (sob ... sob ...) That's the meanest -- I can't help it!! I have a glandular condition!!!"


5:04 PM, May 19, 2005  
Blogger halloweenlover said...

Oh, I love NSAH!!! Yes yes, just start pointing at the belly and saying "What? what are you talking about?" or the slurring your words part. Very funny.

I'd also love to order loads of non-alcoholic drinks as APL suggested. HA!

I am going to try it someday if I am ever pregnant. People in Boston pride themselves on being reserved and accepting these days, so we'll see if they say anything.

11:04 AM, May 20, 2005  
Blogger Phantom Scribbler said...

I'm in Boston (well, secret suburb), halloweenlover. My coffee experience was in a Boston cafeteria. But maybe it's less likely to happen if you don't hang around with so many health-care types...

12:06 PM, May 21, 2005  
Blogger phoenix said...

I am with NSAH also... I prefer making people feel completely stupid when they butt into something that was none of their business to begin with :) Always gives me a smile afterwards!

9:51 PM, May 22, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Trust me, I'm one of the biggest haters of the human race & I feel that the she should have put them in their place since it was non alcoholic b/c people are just annoy me quite frankly. That being said, obviously it seems as if they didn't know it was non alcoholic & I for one think it's refreshing that somebody will actually stand up for a baby for once. As somebody who desperately wants a child it makes me sick to my stomach every time I see a pregnant mother lighting up a smoke & I can't imagine how I'd feel if I saw a pregnant mother drinking. If this couple was defending an innocent child then I don't think they were that out of line. I think sometimes we take the "woman's body is her own" too far. This is not directed at Andrea AT ALL, I'm on her side. The reason I even came across this blog is b/c I'm going to a Christmas party w/ my pregnant friend & was researching pregnant mothers drinking non alcoholic beer before I bought her a six pack to take w/ her! I'm just trying to think outside the box a little.

7:26 PM, December 15, 2006  

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